Whole Self

You may have heard the phrase, "Bring your whole self to work". This is something I have worked on over the past few years. Immediately after college, I definitely separated my life at work from my life at home. I was a respectable and professional robot in the workplace and didn't bring the natural spirit, enthusiasm, and high-energy demeanor that I had with my friends and family. At work, I enjoyed what I did and was pretty successful but I felt that something was missing. 

Then I slowly realized that my personality could be a strength while working.

Bringing my "whole self" - meaning full-blown personality, quirks, and all - to work has not only helped me enjoy work more but also helps me make a bigger impact. If you know me, I love working and getting in the "flow" (no matter how tedious the work is). This is a characteristic that has always allowed me to grow quickly. Bringing my "whole self" also resulted in a realization that sometimes my brain works in different ways from my colleagues. This forces me to pause and reflect in my interactions, to make a conscious effort to ensure I am always treating people with the respect and kindness that they deserve. I have no doubt that this helps create a more enjoyable and productive environment.

At work, I love integrating my love for photography, product-building, team-building, and behavioral science into my day-to-day. Conversely, in my personal day-to-day, I love discussing my work; my friends are probably tired of hearing about CVS Health, but can probably attest to my passion. I'm blessed to be with a partner with whom I can discuss my work and I get tons of ideas from our conversations.

I don't think many people doubt the benefits of bringing your whole self to work. But the same idea should be brought to our personal lives as well. In other words - Bring your whole self to life. And take pride in it. 

I've seen it too many times where people pressure their friends because of some characteristic that doesn't fit into the social mainstream. Or people pressure themselves to conform just because of social constructs. 

It is often labeled as "innocent" when putting down someone for liking a song because it's too childish/girly/boyish/stupid. I know I've felt discouraged by someone's innocent comment which they probably didn't think anything of.

Being your whole self also includes staying true to passions you may hold that aren't widely mainstream. At some point between being a toddler and becoming a teenager, children are taught to have a certain identity based on gender, race, or other characteristics we may not control. This really restricts people.

I've been lucky to have identified multiple different environments where I can be my whole self. While I don't have the disposition to fall into peer pressure easily, I am encouraged to be myself by those close to me. It doesn't matter what others think, but the support of my peers is empowering. I do acknowledge that, as a heterosexual Asian man, I am extremely lucky to have many characteristics that are widely accepted by others. 

One thing I love about people is their passion for whatever they love; it doesn't matter what their passions are. It's always interesting to hear how they got there (probably why I love the podcast, How I Built This). I particularly love hearing about niche interests because I'll probably learn plenty of new things.

I truly enjoy discussing how people improve their lives and seeing if I can learn from their experiences or if I can help them improve theirs.

I think in many friendships, there is a sort of separation between the whole self and the person in the friendships. There is an expectation in social media to present the ideal life. But that's not what I like to discuss. I like the struggles in life. For example, how to get to the impact in life they want to make or how someone is working on an objective in their life (e.g. getting better at something). It is in the struggle where people learn to grow beyond what they tend to think is possible; it is often what defines an individual.

There are two sides to empowerment. That is the individual feeling empowered and those people around empowering them. I'm fortunate to be in an environment where I have both and I hope I extend it to those around me as best as I can.