Life on Autopilot/Routines
Many of my life activities are done on autopilot, meaning I don't think about doing it.
It eliminates decision-making and reduces energy spent.
Made for Autopilot
Some things can be set and should be on autopilot. These activities are usually simple tasks, have little to no consequences if done incorrectly, and don’t involve emotions. For example, washing your hands after you use the bathroom. It is advantageous to put these activities on autopilot as it would save energy for things that take more intention.
Once you reach an acceptable level at these actions, there is no reason to really spend more time or effort in improving.
Examples: Clothes to wear (think Steve Jobs), What to eat for certain meals/days, maintaining exercising
Should not be on autopilot
Activities that you would like to improve at or could have significant consequences should not be on autopilot.
Engagement is important for many activities. It is the engagement that gives meaning.
Most things that you want to improve in will probably require routines that are not on autopilot. This includes most skills (e.g. leadership, athletics, creativity, communication, technical skills). From what I have seen, the top performers in most fields tend to act with intention; they practice with so much purpose that it may seem like it’s on autopilot at times.
Practicing in a sport should be intentional. If it’s done on autopilot, your performance will plateau. UConn’s Women's Basketball Coach, Geno Auriemma, intentionally reminds his team that the competition will defeat them if they don’t continually get better. Auriemma’s teams make it seem that they win on autopilot but the reality couldn’t be further from that. It’s no wonder why he has the most wins in college basketball (men’s or women’s).
While it makes sense for some activities to be set on autopilot, it can often come with consequences. For example, you can set up autopay for your credit card bills. But if you don't check how much you spend, you may have a tendency to overspend and not save as much as you would like on that house/car/retirement.
Routine vs Autopilot
All autopilot activities are routines. All routines should not be on autopilot.
The issue with autopilot is that the meaning of the activity can lose its meaning or its original intent.
Most things in relationships with people are better done with intention rather than autopilot. This doesn’t mean you cannot have routines with people; on the contrary, they can help relationships. It becomes less valuable when people think they are required to do something because “It’s what we do” rather than the original intent and being engaged.
Just because you go out to date night regularly doesn’t mean you are necessarily spending quality time with that person. If you intentionally spend the time to improve your relationship, then that intent is fulfilled. But if you think it’s enough to be in each other’s presence and on your phones on autopilot, the intent is no longer being fulfilled.
Even if the intent and meaning are intact with the routine, it doesn't mean that the action still aligns with your goals in life. Our behavior and habits should adapt to the stage of life we're in. My ability to stay up to 2AM frequently in my 20's certainly disappeared in my 30's.
How much of autopilot is driven by social pressure rather than your desires?
During most of my teenage years, I stayed in bed longer on the weekends than I would have liked because I thought I was supposed to want to sleep in on the weekends. In every TV show and movie, teenagers hated to wake up on the weekends. My entire life, I never liked sleeping in. Mornings on the weekend have become one of my favorite times because the world is quieter (including grocery stores!).
One of the more common autopilot behaviors today is bringing out the phone at any quiet moment. I’ve been a repeat offender of this. Whenever nothing is happening or there is silence, I instinctively unlock my phone and open an app to distract myself (whether that be checking Instagram, email, Reddit, or finances).
Not all actions will be enjoyable or fun, but they should contribute to your happiness. (I will probably write about types of fun in the future)
Reflection Activity
Think about the various things you do that may be on autopilot.
Making a list could be helpful
It could be helpful to list how much time/effort each item is
What do they provide in your life?
Reflect on whether you would like to make any changes
Not all actions on autopilot are bad, and those that can be done on autopilot will save energy for other parts of your life
Would it be valuable if the activity was done with more intentionality?
Does the activity align with your life ambitions?
Personal Example
Watching Football
Minimum of 4 hours for one game. Often multiple games between Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and Thursday.
Benefits
Relaxing watching athletes perform at their best
Help determine who I should play on my Fantasy Football team
Football was social but mostly through texts and only watch the game with friends only a few times. Fantasy Football added even more time spent on football each week.
When I thought about this a few years ago, I knew I could use the multiple hours every week spent on other aspects of life. This includes exploring my area/community more, setting time to reflect (free from distraction), and photography.
I started by watching only Indianapolis Colts games. Eventually, I stopped altogether. It's not to say that I won't watch football ever again; I would happily join friends if they are having a party or they are going to a game in person.
Common Autopilot Activities
Morning Routine
Bedtime Routine
Watching TV/Movies after work
Saying "yes" to everything you're invited to
Turning to social media to distract oneself
Work
Eating habits
Exercising routine